Panic
by Blue Wolf2
Summary: "I had gone with the intention of not coming back, you know." While stuck in an elevator, Ziva and Tony discuss Somalia.


**Panic**

They're in the elevator when the building loses power and the car lurches to a stop. The lights flicker off and Tony lets out a rather loud expletive. After a few seconds the safety lights come on. He's about to say something when he hears heavy breathing. He turns to find Ziva crouched on the floor, her head in her hands.

"Ziva?" She shakes her head, muttering something under her breath. "Ziva, you ok?" He crouches down next to her, lightly touching her shoulder. She flinches and when she looks at him she is surprised to see a look of hurt on his face. "Hey, it's ok."

She shakes her head again. "I can't…"

"Can't what?"

"Be in here." She says and slumps to the ground.

Finally the light bulb in his head goes off. It's been just over six months since they rescued her from Somalia. Though the elevator is smaller than the cell she was held in that summer, it's triggered a panic attack.

"Hey, we're safe. Well…kinda. You just need to breathe."

"I am trying Tony."

He nods. "Ok." He sits down next to her and is surprised when she lets her head fall onto his shoulder. "Why does this always happen?" he asks.

She chuckles. "I do not know. I think from now on we should take the stairs."

"Sounds like a plan." He glances down and can see that while her breathing has returned to normal, she's shaking. "So uh…do you wanna talk about it?"

"Talk about what?"

"You know…that, that summer." He feels her body stiffen. "We don't have to," he says in a rush. "I just figured…it might help to you know, get your feelings out there."

"I talked to the department psychologist. And Ducky." Her voice comes out in a chipped tone.

"But how much did you tell them?" he whispers and looks at her. She's staring ahead at the elevator door. "Ziv-"

"There was no window." She says and he waits for her to continue. "It was not just the…. _size_ of the room. But the fact that I couldn't tell what time of day it was. Or how many days had passed."

"How long did you think you were there?" his voice comes out in a whisper.

"I do not know. I was able to keep track for about a week, based on their clothes and when they brought me what little food I was allowed. But after that…"

"What?"

"That was when the interrogation started. Keeping track of the days was the least of my worries."

His stomach clenches into a knot. Part of him wishes they had taken Saleem alive, just so he could be the one to kill him. "They didn't question you right away?"

She shakes her head and pulls her knees to her chest. "It is a common tactic. You make the prisoner wait. You force them to wonder when it will happen, how long they have been there. The weak ones break soon after that. If they have not broken from the waiting, you move onto…more extreme techniques."

"Torture." She nods. They're both silent for awhile, neither of them knowing what to say. Eventually Tony speaks. "I had gone with the intention of not coming back, you know." Ziva turns to look at him. "We were sure you were dead. I had decided that I was going to take down the bastard who killed you. Or die trying." She doesn't say anything. Instead she slips her hand into his as they look at one another. "Do you remember how you once told me you'd never be taken alive?" He asks and he can see something flash in her eyes. She nods silently. "What changed?"

She licks her lips. "I was…so intent on killing Saleem that I thought I might be able to take him out once I was inside. When it became apparent that would not happen I thought…" She stops and stares at the wall again.

"That someone would come for you." He finishes her words. He watches as she nods and tears begin to prick her eyes. He releases her hand and slowly moves it to the back of her head, lightly gripping the hair at the base of her neck. "Ziva." His voice is soft and when she turns to look at him, he also has tears in his eyes. "I would have come for you sooner, had I known. I would do anything for you. I hope you know that."

She nods, her breath catching in her throat. "I know." No man, not her Father, her brother or even Michael had ever showed her as much love and loyalty as the man before her had. It was once something she didn't know how to deal with. Now, she is grateful there are people out there looking out for her.

Eventually they hear the repair crew calling, saying they'll have the doors open in a few minutes. They both stand, once again interlocking their hands. Ziva takes one last look at Tony as the doors begin to move. "I'm glad we didn't die." She says softly and he turns to look at her. He knows he doesn't need to say anything. So he simply gives her a smile.

 **AN: I know in the show there was a window in her cell, just go with it.**


End file.
